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Hospital 04


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Chimpanzee (in a surprisingly deep voice): Excuse me, are you aware that the hospital's supply of bananas has been… compromised? There appears to be a significant shortage. My research suggests this could be linked to a rogue colony of squirrels hoarding them for a miniature banana-themed Renaissance fair they’re planning.

Dr. Finch: (Stares at the chimpanzee) Dr. Ramirez, are you seeing this?

Dr. Ramirez: (Equally bewildered) Sir, my avian resonance index is showing… significant fluctuations! And I think the squirrels might be using tiny trebuchets.

(Mr. Henderson, who has been listening to all of this, pipes up.)

Date

Wed Apr 1 07:39:11 AM UTC 2026

Global Update

Jfty

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